We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Say When

by Sam Steffen

/
1.
Hey, Babe 05:24
Hey, babe—will you step out of that shadow Will you open up your window? I’m down here in the rain Throwin pebbles from the drain And I gotta say my aim—it ain’t so good Hey babe, will you just listen for a second I know you haven’t called or beckoned me I came of my own free will At the risk of falling ill To see if you were still up and in this neighborhood But it was only the errand of a fool, I see Like you were waiting up for someone, and that someone wasn’t me Hey, babe—I can tell that you been crying You say you weren’t but you’re just lyin, now You got water on your dress And I don’t mean to press But how do you suggest that I think otherwise? Hey, babe—you don’t have to act so perfect You can’t be blamed for every serpent tongue That slithers down to ask While you’re walkin your own path Whether something from your past has gone unrecognized But it’s only the remnant of a dream, I’m sure Like recollections of a place you feel you’ve been but never were Hey, babe—are you alright, you look a little Like you been cut right through the middle Like your mind’s been sawn in two And you don’t know what to do But your sure it can’t be you there in the bathroom meer Hey, babe—won’t you tell me what’s the trouble You spelled it out but much too subtly I’ve never been to sharp And you got me in the dark And I think I missed the mark you left somewhere round here But it’s only a hieroglyphic drawn in sand Even if I could perceive it I’m sure I still wouldn’t understand Hey, babe—can I just say that I’m sorry If I hurt you with my story You know I never meant For it to go the way it went The impression that I’m lent is that it left you sore Hey, babe—I don’t need you to say nothing Words are cheap, a dime a dozen I give em out for free And they just come back to me Likes waves upon the sea crashing on the shore
2.
When you’re all through lookin for prince charming Who’s no more than a wolf in sheep’s clothes When you’ve tried on all the glass slippers And not one has left room for your toes When you’re tired of putting up posters Advertisements, pictures and flyers When you’ve reviewed each application And there’s a good deal left to be desired I’ll be right here waiting You don’t have to explain a thing I’m plain as they come—no one’s number one But if you’re lonesome, I’m the next best thing When you’re tired of keeping a standard So high even birds fall quite short When you’ve called in all of your favors And are desperate for some last resort When you can’t tell how long you’ve been crying Whether anybody out there’s hearing ya When you’re ready to throw out the rulebook For a new set of criteria I’ll be right here waiting I ain’t gonna bite you or sting It’s no big surprise—I’m nobody’s prize But if you’re lonesome, I’m the next best thing When your heart can’t take any more teasing And your tongue just can’t tell one more lie And the size of your sorrow’s increasing And each breath you breathe’s just a sigh When you’re twisted from all of the pressure That’s on you to find someone to love Which you don’t even know how to measure Short of shrinking neath what you’re above I’ll be right here waiting Off the mainstage in the back of the wing I’m not the star of the show—I’m no one’s hero But if you’re lonesome I’m the next best thing
3.
We arrive at the picture show an hour fore it starts What I call entertainment you call art You always cry at the funniest parts That’s why I love you You take the high road and I take the low When I’m in a hurry you’re movin slow I say, “You know what?” and you already know That’s why I love you You ain’t like other people, you’re a diamond in the rough You’re shy in front of strangers, but you act so tough You don’t like much attention, you’re very quick to blush That’s why I love you The only time you need me’s when your parking meter’s done You ask me for a quarter and I give you one You rack a hundred dollar ticket cause you give it to a bum That’s why I love you Whenever it’s your birthday, you never ask for gifts I bring you wine and roses, you say what’s all this? You don’t see the sense in celebrating the fact that you exist That’s why I love you You never do what’s fashionable, you make up your own trends If the ladies room is crowded, you just use the men’s I don’t understand you sometimes, you don’t make any sense That’s why I love you You never draw outside the lines, you follow all the rules When it comes to bein punctual you’re stubborn as a mule You’ve never heard of Taylor Swift, but you think Peter Lorre’s cool That’s why I love you
4.
I’m wounded—some arrow must’ve caught me off guard I can’t see my own hand in this place, it’s so dark Lady luck must’ve held out to deal me these cards In this light, every bull’s eye’s a big questionmark I don’t want to keep you if you don’t wish to remain Still I wish there were something I could say to explain I only wanted to feel like I wasn’t insane Loving you was the closest that I ever came I’m not one to accomplish whatever I set out to do There’s only so much that one person can try Using brass-tacks and duct-tape, adhesives and glue You can stop all the holes but it don’t mean you can fly I don’t want to keep you if you don’t wish to remain Still I wish there were something I could say to explain I just wanted someway to keep out of the rain Loving you was the closest that I ever came Over and over I ask myself: Why?— at what point, exactly, did my intentions stray? I can’t help but feel, no matter how hard I try The whole time, it was only an armslength away I’ve sought buried treasure using antique maps I’ve travelled extensively on the rumor of jewels I’ve interviewed strangers, collected their facts Withstood the judgment of prophets and fools I don’t want to keep you if you don’t wish to remain Still I wish there were something I could say to explain I just wanted money, power, fortune and fame— Loving you was the closest that I ever came Don’t say it, you don’t have to—I’m goin away These words are the last you’ll hear from me for a time It gets more confusing the longer I stay It’s not working out for you—and that’s fine I don’t want to keep you if you don’t wish to remain Still I wish there were something I could say to explain I just wanted someone who’d take her share of the blame Loving you was the closest that I ever came BRIDGE The search must continue, what can I do but go on? I’ll keep movin til I find a new home, I suppose Where some lonesome lady’s waiting up for the dawn Prayin for respite from all that she knows I don’t want to keep you if you don’t wish to remain Still I wish there were something I could say to explain I just wanted someone who knew me by my name Loving you was the closest that I ever came Time’s passing—I’m agin—getting older each day There’s more to look back on than ahead to by now I thought I’d be happy, but what can I say? I believed it back then, and always knew it somehow I don’t want to keep you if you don’t wish to remain Still I wish there were something I could say to explain I just wanted someway of easing my pain Loving you was the closest that I ever came
5.
Say When 05:46
You still can’t decide if it’s better to hide or to come out wearing your blues When push comes to shove you’re able to love just as far as you’re willing to lose You’ve poured out your cup but it keeps filling up flowing over again As what was collides with what might have been What might’ve been if only we’d known We might’ve turned round we might’ve come home We might’ve grown old, we might’ve been shown A way of our own Through thick and thin And gone it alone I just can’t say when Your foregone concern as you try to relearn how to let go and how to hold on Is with whether or not you’ve already forgot how he’s right here now that he’s gone The tables’ve turned upon what you discerned to be the difference between you and them Without ever once giving up you had to give in Had to give in if only to sleep Every once in a while, maybe once in a week Or once you’ve come back From making the leap And stopping the leak By going all in On this losing streak I just can’t say when Your only defense as you try to make sense of this trial you’ve put yourself through Is how you’re consoled by your lack of control and you realize it might’ve been you You’re trine to accept what you couldn’t expect would be waiting for you on the wind He wasn’t my brother by blood but he was my friend He was my friend, you told to them all As they lent you their ears and let their eyes fall And backed away slow Saying nothing at all Not like I don’t know The way it’ll go The way that it’s been There’ll be tomorrow I just can’t say when The time it moves fast but you cant feel it pass as you sit up and talk with the moon This mountain of grief can be moved with belief but all anyone brought is a spoon You’re tryin so hard not to let down your guard but now that you know how it ends It might as well break wherever it bends Right where it bends, before it deserts And they ask you to say right where it hurts And you show up one morning Wearing one of his shirts That you pulled from the dirt And you tried to convert But you just disconcert I know that it hurts I know where it hurts I know how it hurts I know why it hurts I just can’t say when
6.
There’s a feeling in the atmosphere that a storm’s about to break The sky’s about as bruised as it could be If I don’t tell her how I feel it’ll be my own mistake A girl like that won’t wait around for me The forecast says precipitation’s likely—99% I guess that means there’s still a chance it won’t But there I go inventing each explanation to prevent Me from doing what I ought to if I don’t Here goes nothing I suppose To tell her I love her and show her how I been saving for a rainy day—and hey, what do you know? It’s raining now the weatherman’s been drawing crazy circles on his chart he says he thinks it’s going to rain on our parade is there something I can do to help in case this falls apart what was it just now you were going to say? It started kind of gentle now it’s raining cats and dogs I regret that I’m not a little more prepared First I’m stranded in the desert, now I’m trapped in the mirage It might look to brave to you from out there, but truth be told I’m scared Chorus I looked out my attic window, it’s still morning but it’s dark I feel like I’ve still got a lot to say My next-door neighbor, Noah, built himself a little ark Awhile ago I watched him sail away If it weren’t for drought season I’d’ve probably already drowned I’m not one who’s been known for making plans the survivor in me’s thinking we should head for higher ground but the thought of leaving you’s what keeps me standing where I am— chorus
7.
she was married when I met her but it was hanging by a thread I’d good reason to believe that she’d wanted me instead I’ll never know just how the thought ever got into my head— I know she never loved me, but I could’ve swore she did I smelled her honeysuckle so I followed where it lead A line of fools stood at her door with gifts of wine and bread I asked if they had thought to knock, they told me, “Go right ahead,” I know she never loved me, but I could’ve swore she did I could’ve swore she did—I could’ve swore she did She always was the kind to keep her thoughts under a lid If I’d money to wager on, I’d of surely lost the bid I know she never loved me, but I could’ve swore she did I’s admitted to her parlor by a butler in a wig I shook hands with her father and he asked me what I did I told him off the record that I aimed to make it big I know she never loved me, but I could’ve swore she did I spied her on the landing hearing every word I said She descended as my face was turning every shade of red I asked her out to dinner and she took me straight to bed I know she never loved me, but I could’ve swore she did I could’ve swore she did—I could’ve swore she did Every look she gave me said that she was interested I’s never one to fall in love, but I tripped and slipped and slid I know she never loved me, but I could’ve swore she did Afterwards I watched her as she rolled her cigarette then smiled at me mysteriously and told me how I did To me the word “tomorrow” sounded like an empty threat I know she never loved me, but I could’ve swore she did She asked me what my name was, where I’d lived and what I’d read I told her and she laughed and said, “My God, you’re just a kid!” She showed me out the back door, though I begged her and I plead— I know she never loved me but I could’ve swore she did interlude Along life’s lonesome highway I’ve drifted and I’ve sped Love is a thought the likes of which by now I’ve gotten rid Alone into this world I’s born, and alone I’ll be when I’m dead I know she never loved me, but I could’ve swore she did
8.
Silly Me 06:37
Once I thought I had you pegged as one of those who knew the world You spoke of it so plainly Alluded to it in the past-tense mainly But I’ve come a long way since then, and now I know That you’ve always been uncertain About what’s just behind the curtain Afraid to name the thing that’s hurtin you so badly Funny, I never knew—silly me Once I thought dreams could come true, anyone could be whatever they put their minds Or backs into becoming The gun is fired, the racers are off and running But I’ve come a long way since then, and now I know That it ain’t the dream that drives you That determines or decides you That undoes and divides you any way it can, you see Funny, I thought it was—silly me Once I thought I found true love awaiting me in the most Obvious of places Wearing one of its million faces But I’ve come a long way since then, and now I know That love has its disguises As many let-downs as surprises And its veteran advises to look only after you leap Funny, I didn’t know—silly me Once I thought I had it bad; I’d taken all the beatings That this world had to give me I had the scars to show and to carry with me But I’ve come a long way since then, and now I know That sure the current’s slowin But the rivers still strongly flowin And no matter how well you’re rowin Signs of stopping it ain’t showing You know you really had me goin—for a while there it seems Funny, I didn’t know—silly me
9.
Over My Head 06:45
It started out small, well within my control Steady as she goes, man, that’s always the goal You give it a push, you feel the nudge of a pull Suddenly what you’re chasin’s gone and swallowed you whole And if you—were me I bet you would already know Just what to do—to get free Of feelin like you got nowhere to go Chorus: But I’m in over my head, my back’s gainst the wall At the end of my rope and I got nowhere to fall I’m in over my head, I feel kinda small Funny, I always thought I was tall And ain’t it a drag how hard you can try and it don’t make any difference at all? I reached for my hat, she took a hold of my hand I bid her goodevening, she did not understand She said to speak up, said to say where I stand Next thing you know she’s got the whole wedding planned And if you were me You’d’ve known it, I spose, right from the start That what the eyes can see Ain’t half of what’s there to be seen by the heart Chorus They gave me a job, so we bought a house Moved in together, now I sleep on the couch I asked someone to pinch me, I said “Ouch,” Now I wished I had the sense to put my foot in my mouth And if you were me Tell me what would be your next move Would you stay or leave This has moved well beyond any point I may have been trying to prove Chorus I travel the world, I see my old friends I say it’s been too long, they say how long’s it been I tell em the news, they say, Tell It Again They say I’ll be find but they don’t ever say when And if they only knew How hard they can be, sometimes, to please Maybe then I could make do Without glimpsing a sight of the forest from the trees Chorus Rain’s gonna fall, sun’s gonna rise Life’s gonna pass you in the blink of an eye And whether you’re foolish, whether you’re wise It don’t make no difference because everyone dies And it’s hard to believe That it’s ever gonna happen to me I been alive for so long I forget that there’s any other way I could be Chorus
10.
“Tomorrow,” she said, “I’ll be leaving, my ticket is already bought If you don’t ask, I won’t give no reason—I won’t take any more than I brought.” I told her I’d be there tomorrow, right at the first light of dawn But this morning I knocked on her window, her neighbor said she’d already gone “Did she leave any note? Did she tell you how come? Did she give any good reason why? I never had time to explain what I done Or got the chance to tell her—goodbye.” Well I knew she was here on a visit, that she didn’t intend to stay long But I remember her now like a music that my whole life’s just been following long I recall how she kept at a distance and seemed so reluctant to show Any feelin at the mention of lovers whose stories you already know Still—I meant to explain the rules of the game On the off-chance she intended to fly But I never obtained so much as her name Or got the chance to tell her goodbye Now I know that I shouldn’t be jealous of the sly things that other folks do There isn’t a brave soul among us in this world who ain’t just passin through I know that I’m no less as likely to seem just as vague and aloof To shine as dimly or as brightly to any person of comparable youth But I just can’t digest the feelin, I guess That some people just act much too shy I never bestowed any more than hello Or got the chance to tell her goodbye

credits

released October 3, 2021

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Sam Steffen Boise, Idaho

Sam Steffen is a Pennsylvania-bred, Boise-based singer-songwriter whose songs are the torch-wood for a new generation of folk music that has learned from the best stuff in the tradition and aims in spite of everything to keep the human spirit alive and kicking. A versatile musician and skilled finger-picker, Sam is at heart a story-teller, and a prolific one. ... more

contact / help

Contact Sam Steffen

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

If you like Sam Steffen, you may also like: