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Wet Match

by Sam Steffen

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William Steffen
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1.
Take Your Coat Off and Stay Awhile 03:47
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Your eyes look heavy, your shirts stained with tears You look like you aint had a good night’s rest in years The evening is young yet, but the morning, she nears All that lies in darkness soon will be made clear— you can lose the burden, add your complaints to the pile Why don’t you take your coat off and stay awhile? You look like you just seen the worst part of a brawl I’d hate to see the other guy, if he even made it out at all Youre on your last legs, with your back gainst the wall If you try to move you know you’re just gonna fall But seeing you try, man, you know it just makes me smile Why don’t you take off your coat—and stay awhile? I got friends in low places, I got enemies close-by I could tell you some stories that’d make you laugh til you cry You can’t win em all, but you know you can try But I ain’t sellin nothing that you don’t wanna buy I ain’t gonna pressure you out of your own denial Why don’t you take your coat off and stay awhile Can I fix for you a cup of something warm While you dry off, take shelter from the storm? The sails right off of their riggings have torn Anything that needs doing’ll have to wait til the morn your troubles out there are lined up in single file why don’t you—take off your coat, and stay awhile? Wipe your muddy boots off, hang up your dusty hat You’re makin me nervous pacing the floor like that the bus is busted, the wheels have gone flat there engine’s been burned up, along with the map even if we were able, I wouldn’t drive one more mile why don’t you—take your coat off, stay awhile? you can make yourself at home, here, do just as you please it’ll be morning fore the jailer gets back with the keys the guards have gone home, soldiers stand at ease You can do whatever you like—anything except leave Ain’t nobody in here gonna put you on trail Why don’t you—take off your coat and stay awhile? You don’t need to get angry, we’re all in the same boat It’s not like anyone put our fates to a vote It’s a dog-eat-dog world, and that’s all that she wrote If it don’t make a good story, it’ll make a fine anecdote I’ll even tell it to you, long as you don’t touch that dial Why don’t you—take your coat off, and stay awhile? I also have struggled, I ain’t no different from you Had all of my money strung up in my shoe Had everything stolen from me a time or two Had to start over, and relearn all that I knew Be not afraid of me, honey, be reconciled— Why don’t you—take off your coat, and stay awhile?
2.
Stuck 06:34
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Met a cloud passin overhead through the windowpane right beside my bed “Hello down there, are you,” it said, “Alive?” I said “How am I to tell, sometimes I look alright when I feel like hell I guess I’m doin well—enough to get by” I met a tree out on highway nine, a lone handsome ponderosa pine He said he wished he had legs like mine so he could run I said I’ll give you these here boots if you teach me how to lay down roots He said sometimes there’s substitutes, but this just aint one And isn’t it just my luck—soon as I get goin, the goin get’s tough Lose my shoes and the road gets rough on me again I bet it all and they call my bluff, they leave me fifty cents when I need a buck And I’m just trine to get out of bein stuck right where I am I’m still standin in the same spot where I began Cept I’m sunk now a little bit deeper in the sand And I’m cryin out for help cause I need a hand You know I’ll return the favor someday, if I can I met a doctor who was ill, who said it was only a matter of time until The disease would begin to kill him or itself He asked me what my trouble was, I said I’m just waitin for my bell to buzz And even if it never does, at least I got my health I met a lady in a turquoise hat, she asked me a few questions about this and that And in 30 seconds flat she forgot my name She told me her biography, along with most of the whole world’s history And for what escaped her memory she felt ashamed Chorus I got a pen that just won’t write, got a pack of matches, not a one will light I got a song for you tonight, but it won’t make you stay I got a knife that just won’t cut, a refrigerator door that won’t stay shut I got a lot of things here, but what good are they? I got one eye that just won’t blink, got a thirst I can’t quench with just one drink I got a brain that just can’t think it’s troubles through I got a parrot that won’t repeat, got a hunger in me that just don’t wanna eat I got a heart that just won’t beat for no one else but you Chorus
3.
Gotta Get Out of the City For Awhile 03:43
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Moved to the city the other day, Less to be there than to get away I got a quarter of the space I had, and the rent it costs a pile My roommates all work through the night Come home at dawn put out the lights Sleep all day and all afternoon Wake up again when they can see the moon Their trash all through the apartment’s strewn They say I’ll be like them pretty soon I think I gotta get out of the city—for a while Time came when I should’ve wrote I sent a postcard to my folks Dear Ma, I’m so depressed I’ve forgotten how to smile Nobody knows my name And every day is about the same The sun comes up and the sun goes down People just trine to move around Everybody wears a frown You say hello, they look at the ground I think I gotta get out of the city—for a while My coat’s dirty, tattered, torn My pants is old and warped and worn My boots is so full up of holes and get worse with every mile Walkin round here and there It’s hard to make it most anywhere Trucks a honkin, trolley’s squeakin Trains a rumbling, cars a beepin At 3 am the neighbor’s screamin Fore you know it, I’ll be leavin I think I gotta get out of the city—for a while I was bred in the place I’m from But here I feel just like a crumb When you’re used to woods and mountains, the city’s what seems wild Sometimes people start to yell What at, though, you can’t always tell Hey—what’re you lookin at? Hey—how are you doin, cat? What do you know? How bout that? Look out you don’t step on that rat I think I gotta get out of the city for a while A good job has been hard to find That’ll keep you out of the daily grind Every morning its like herded sheep, all in single file The workers come in from outside In a car or bus or train they ride The builders build the buildings tall Back you right up against the wall Make you feel that you’re pretty small Til you got no room to yourself at all I think I gotta get out of the city for a while Folks tell me in a while I’ll see A change start to come over me You’ll still think you’re miserable but you’ll just be in denial You’ll get away for a week or two Go to the shore, take in the view Youll miss the sidewalks and the throng They’ll sing to you like a siren-song You’ll see you’ve loved it all along You’ll start to feel like something’s wrong: You’ll think you gotta get back to the city for a while
4.
Every Little Step of the Way 05:22
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The time now has come for facing the facts, our love has grown cold to the touch We’re giving it everything that we have and our best still ain’t good enough Perhaps I’m to blame for trying too hard to make this into something it wasn’t For making the case that it matters to you when both of us know that it doesn’t But who knows in spite of all that went wrong, it might still have turned out okay If you hadn’t a snagged me and dragged me along every little step of the way You don’t have to make like you’re really upset, you don’t have to tell me you’re sorry You don’t gotta act like it’s the end of the world, it’s only the end of our story I can’t really say that I’m glad it occurred, but I won’t say I’m sorry it’s over The things about me that you still haven’t heard are probably best left undiscovered But you never know somehow we might’ve pulled thru, might’ve even gotten married someday If you hadn’t a lived like you’d nothing to lose, every little step of the way I like to believe I can account for my part more than only part of the time That what looks like a fault’s just a lapse in attention rather than a flaw in design The vultures that swooped down to feed on my spleen were merely doing what they were made to The leeches that drained me and sucked my bones clean shouldn’t have frightened or phased you And as for the demons that hounded my heart, you know I could’ve kept em at bay If you hadn’t a pushed me and pulled me apart, every little step of the way You said you were tired of having this fight, the one that always ends in confusion With one of us kissing the other goodnight and returning to the routine illusion The picture in glass that hangs on your wall, the one in which everyone’s laughin Seems to account for how I can recall events that never actually happened But even with my head in a fog, I might’ve made it out of the gray If you hadn’t a thrown a wrench in the cog every little step of the way From now on I’ll do my best to be fair whenever telling people about us I’ll say that our roads ran together awhile and then quite simply went on without us You’ve taken your portion and dealt out your share of insults and harmful lines if you’ve told me once I’m an old so-and-so, then you’ve told me a thousand times And who knows, even in spite of the odds, we might’ve overcome the forces at play If you hadn’t a toyed with and tempted the gods, every little step of the way your promises frequently died in their birth or unraveled like thread on a spool And your favors all cost me more than their worth, and your help was at best miniscule Cause you never so little as tried to be kind, and you never so much as succeeded in the object of snubbing and robbing me blind, a hint would’ve been all that I needed But who knows, despite all the reasons to go, I might’ve found the courage to stay If you hadn’t accused me of moving too slow every little step of the way I have been called many things in my time, but a traveler’s what I mainly am With nothing to tell of where I am bound, nor to say of where it was I began When I come to a fork in the road, I pause; sometimes it’s just a second or two Long enough to suppose that I am the sum of everything that I’ve been through But the light’s never still where I stand alone, and I can afford no further delay And I dream that I’m always arriving at home with every little step of the way
5.
Something Blue 06:19
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So you say you’ve finally found the one you been awaiting all your life And you say that now he’s asked for you to come and be his wife And by the way you’re smiling now, I don’t suppose you told him, “No,” I don’t suppose you said where he could go— And every bride within your family’s had some tradition to stick to With something old, something brand-new, something borrowed, something blue To wear or carry down the aisle to satisfy the trend And you say you’d like my advice, just as your friend For something old you got that wedding dress your great-grandmother sewed For something new, you got that wedding ring of 14 karat gold For something borrowed you could take the torch I been holding out for you And hell, invite me to your wedding, I’ll be your something blue I guess I should be happy that you found someone to love Who, from the gutter of the world, knows that you’re outside and above Who’s probably lived a lonesome life, looking high and low for you Who, in so many words, can see you like I do And I guess I should feel relieved, rather than despised To know I’m not the only one who can see what’s in your eyes And to realize beyond any doubt, that there would have been no way to be the one to say, “I do,” on your wedding day— for something old you got that memory of the two of us, alone for something new you got that house I spose you’ll make into a home for something borrowed you could take the heart I wore on my sleeve for you and hell, invite me to your wedding—I’ll be your something blue it may be too late to tell you now what maybe never needed sayin I may’ve missed the opportunity when you caught that outbound train All I’ve got now to look forward to’s a lifetime of time to kill because I loved you then, and now, and always will and I spose there must be moments, like the spokes on fortune’s wheel, when the broken things within us will begin again to feel when the broad daylight of morning will again seem warm and soft but for me, that day’s still a long ways off for something old you got that story from the madame’s crystal ball for something new you got a family and a portrait on your wall for something borrowed you could take my dreams which have always been of you and hell, invite me to your wedding, I’ll be your something blue
6.
Backslidin 06:10
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The woman takin care of me takes care to never let me be You know I’d go home but she’ll just be standing there In the porchlight with her rolling pin, she’ll cross her arms, say “Where you been?” I’ll say “I can’t say,” and she’ll say, “No, you tell me where,” I’ll say “I can’t say,” and she’ll just sigh and frown And I’ll try to sleep just knowing she’s still standing there Thinking how every time she trusts me I just go and let her down The time it sure has slipped by fast, my curfew’s come and gone and passed And my money all got spent before my tab was paid With another night of streets to roam and anywhere to go but home I’ll begin to wonder of the impact my impression’s made I’ll begin to wonder if I been lost or found I’ll begin to wonder just how far off the path I’ve strayed And if it’s likely I could make it back if I just stopped and turned around But now I’m frightened, more of myself than of the thunder or the lightening More of the dawn than of the night that knows no brightening, lets me keep on hidin I know my wrongs need rightening, and tho I know when it’s just bait well I’m still bitin The more I wait the more I feel the noose a tightenin, and the stakes’re heightening And tho I hardly feel the slack and know I won’t fall through the crack I’m hardly gone before I’m back—backslidin The preacher asks me if I pray, I tell him each and every day He asks me, “How?”—as if he really didn’t know I tell him first I close my eyes then I just kind of wait to be surprised “And does that work?” he always wants to know “And does what work?” I say for my response “Are your prayers answered—does God say ‘yes’ and ‘no’?” I tell him: “Father, God does whatever the hell he damn well wants.” I try to keep the leash on tight, try to do what’s good and just and right And it’s not too hard, so long as no one’s keepin score But somehow midway down the line I find I’m cursed by my own design And its no use explaining what I do things for And its no use trying to use my words Cause all I say is something someone’s said somewhere before And comes out sounding just like nothing that I ain’t already heard But now I’m frightened—more of my self than any madness I’m ignitin More of my heart than of my love that needs requitenin, that feels your spitenin I know my wrongs need rightenin, and tho I’m running low on fuel, well I’m still ridin And tho I’ve broken every rule I was abidenin, seems no one’s mindin And tho it used to be an act, I used to do it just for laughs Seems now the whole charade is cracked and I’m just back—backslidin My teacher taught me to be sick of science and arithmetic “What good,” I asked, “is any of this stuff anyways?” He warned me with a tired scold that “if you don’t do as you’re told Well, you’ll find out for yourself one of these days— And you’ll find out just how far you can get,” And I found out right away because I cursed him to his face And only lately have I thought of it as something I regret The officer of my parole, he says I’m under his control And that if I even laugh too loud, well, he’ll be at my side I can feel his eyes upon my skin, I’d shut them out but they lock me in They say, “You’re lucky,” but that ain’t quite been verified They say, “You’re free again,” but that ain’t quite been proved They had my story written out before I testified And I was sentenced for I knew of what I’d even been accused And now I’m frightened, more of myself than any foe that I’ve been fightin More of the truth than of the lies that they’ve been writing, they’re self-indicting But my wrongs need rightening, and tho I know the fuse is close well I’m still firin The gate that leads to my destruction’s ever-widenin, slowly closing in And tho I knew it for a fact when the cards were dealt the deck was stacked I still went all in for a jack, and now I’m back—backslidin
7.
Cold Shower 03:15
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You wake up in the morning and you’re still drunk from lastnight There’s a tooth missin from your grin You know you gotta get up but you can’t find the light In fact you don’t even know whose bed you’re in The woman beside you just whispered she loved you Which you’re sure you must’ve misunderstood All you need now’s a cold shower—a cold shower A cold shower’ll do you good It’s the middle of summer and it’s a thousand degrees There’s steam risin up from the street The air conditioner’s broken and the icebox won’t freeze There’s no place for you to get out of the heat You race to the pool but you can’t get in it’s full Of every person in your neighborhood All you need now’s a cold shower—a cold shower A cold shower’ll do you good You’ve bought into everything and you think it’s all swell living safely in your American dream you’ve been breathing in foul air so long you can’t even smell you’ve never drawn a single breath that’s clean given the chance to upgrade and enhance, you hesitate, wondering whether you should all you need now’s a cold shower—a cold shower a cold shower’ll do you good
8.
I Think I'm Coming Down With Something Serious 08:55
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I came here by request to see my cousin whose been ill Intending to remain but a week or so My very first day here, I came down with a chill That was nearly seven years ago They put me in a room where a man had just expired Of some disease of which I’m sure I’d never heard They told me all about how much he’d been admired And how sad it was his condition could not be cured— Chorus- I think I’m coming down with something serious I don’t know how long it’ll be before I’m over this I think I’m coming down with something serious I don’t know if I’ll be getting up again I’m sweating like a pig but I could use another sheet My temperatures somewhere around 103 This morning I woke up and then I fell right back to sleep When I opened up my eyes I could not see There’s a man here with a cough so bad he cannot talk Just hacks and wipes his blood off in his sleeve I asked the nurse, “How long before I get to see the doc?” she pointed at him and said, “That’s the man you want to see,” chorus Today I got a call from my boss back down below He said I was due back at work—or else! But I worked all my life, and what have I got to show? As of now, I haven’t even got my health They put me on a cart and wheeled me to a room where they strapped me to an old X-ray machine everyone agreed that something must be done—and soon! but they never told me what any of it means chorus There’s a girl here from Duluth, she cannot speak a word She communicates through shapes made with her hands Whenever she’s around, I feel a pounding in my nerves I get dizzy, weak, and cannot seem to stand— They listened to my heart, they opened up my veins They looked inside my blood for some kind of sign The nurse reported back that my heartbeat was just the rain And it turns out my own blood ain’t even mine— chorus Yesterday I wrote a letter out on the lawn “Dear Uncle,” it said, “Sorry I misspoke. If you reading these words now, it means that I am gone And no, I don’t mean, stepped out for a smoke. I’ve been the child of privilege, known prosperity and wealth; Please take my things and give them to the poor. If you’d like to keep my books, please—go, and help yourself Where I’m going—I won’t need them anymore” Chorus
9.
Storm Beyond the Calm 05:56
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I had a girl I loved her madly; towards me her feeling was lukewarm Later on I learned she had me in the calm before the storm I thought that love would last forever, but I could not have been more wrong You can’t dress for the weather in the storm beyond the calm I aint been here in a long time, tho I guess not much has changed There’s still a beauty in the lightning, there’s still a comfort in the rain They say the night is always darkest the hour before the dawn And love stands at its starkest in the storm beyond the calm I tried livin in the city, but I couldn’t find a friend So I moved into the country, started talking to the wind Now I toil in my pasture, and I sleep out on the lawn And I feel right at home here, in the storm beyond the calm I been up and down the mountain, I trudged through the desert dunes I drank from pleasure’s fountains, and howled at bluer moons But there’s no gold in el dorado, and in gilead’s no balm You’re stuck waiting for tomorrow in the storm beyond the calm And there’s no one to write home to from freedom’s giant cage Everyone that claims to know you just turns your anger into praise Goliath wants a rematch, but David’s busy with his psalms Words are useful as a wet match in the storm beyond the calm So I guess I’ll keep a goin down the road that’s got me lost Leaning gainst the breezes blowin, weighing the spoils against the cost I tried admitting I was weak once, but I’ve never been that strong In the storm beyond the calm I been out on a short limb when the branches have been sawn I brushed against the heavens seen the gorges neath me yawn Death can grin to hear my laughter, but I’ll sing another song And survive one more disaster in the storm beyond the calm
10.
I Wanna Go Home 06:21
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Just a traveler—on a road Making good time; making head-way to nowhere at all Left my footprints—where it snowed That’s as good as any farewell letter I could scrawl I mouthed the words I could not say—as tho I thought I could undo The choice to stand and stay remains—tho it is I who have now forsaken you An empty feelin burns me through—I can’t waiver I can’t linger in this moment anymore With midnight stealing into blue—my whole horizon Is disappearing in a sudden blur I rapped upon the frosted glass—wherein my gaunt reflection shone When I climbed in the cabbie asked—“Where have you been, but first, tell me where you goin?” CHORUS: I wanna go home—home— Home—that’s where I wanna go Breakfast table—a broken plate, mama’s bathrobe Dragging dirty round her ankles on the floor A stream of boxcars hauling freight, and November coming early and unwelcome through the door I woke up inside a bus that had carved all night to make it through a storm I’s just in time to see the fog rise up from out of the Pennsylvania corn No tomorrows—in this town Just a motel with its neon flashing “Vacant” in the cold must be shrinking—these things down in my memory, either that or else I’m just getting old I found a sign that read “free meal” and pressed upon a door to see I nearly cried when the waitress come and asked me: Son, what’ll it be? CHORUS I been to Nashville, outer space, Oklahoma Now I’m sitting in my Philadelphia room Trying to read things I’ve erased, or written over Or told myself I’d reckon pretty soon— Barring not that I should fail, still I—have struggled to resist the thought that where I’m trying to land may well not even exist Life’s a strange sort of museum—full of routines Full of desperate efforts catapulting loss So many visions—you can’t believe em—til its too late Til your faith wears the same odor as exhaust I clicked my heels three times and prayed—to a God I could not see I stamped and addressed myself so the postman would know exactly where to deliver me CHORUS Just a traveler on a road making good time; making headway to nowhere at all

credits

released October 13, 2019

All songs written and performed by Sam Steffen. This album was made in Philadelphia Pennsylvania, on March 25, 2019. Thanks again to Lloyd for the use of his equipment.

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Sam Steffen Boise, Idaho

Sam Steffen is a Pennsylvania-bred, Boise-based singer-songwriter whose songs are the torch-wood for a new generation of folk music that has learned from the best stuff in the tradition and aims in spite of everything to keep the human spirit alive and kicking. A versatile musician and skilled finger-picker, Sam is at heart a story-teller, and a prolific one. ... more

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